My asshat co-worker is back from Red Rocks and I only have one question: why the fuck couldn't you jerk-off chewies just keep him? Let him into your Herpeville. My life would be so much less douchy. He would eat a dog.
The first thing he said to me sounded something like, "Dude-brah totally sparkle unicorn twist trey cock groove spun tweedle-dee-dee."
Then he followed that up with, "Baq it tag it brah stellar epic set closer mist sunshine beard dose hook it up put it in her butt."
I doused him with soap and walked away.
